Consumed

Ever heard of the story of the communist guy? It was many years ago, when this communist wrote a tearful letter to his fiance. And in his letter, he mentioned a dream, his dream, the communist dream. He has reached a point where the dream consumes every portion of his soul, where every waking moment is consumed by the desire to spread the communist propaganda. And because of this, he can't and he won't continue their relationship. Though they were to be married soon.

At times, I do feel consumed by this dream. The dream to see the salvation of Malaysia. The dream of spiritual breakthrough happening in Malaysia. And no, it's not something that comes during a revival concert or a breakthrough camp, but it's something that consumes the very portions of my soul.

Was spending quiet time with God yesterday when again I felt God asking me, 'Leo, would you go? To be the evangelist I've called you to be' And it's not once. It's a thing that keeps repeating itself. Would I go? Would I give my life for a cause greater than this?

Many people have dreams of going overseas, going for a play or retiring happily at the age of 40. But I can't, cause every flitting moment is consumed by the dream, a desire to see a change in Malaysia. How God's gonna do it, I seriously dunno.

I have to admit, I've been distracted. At times, I find my short attention span leading me to something else. But I guess it's time to refocus. I know I live for this dream, this vision, this statement.

I believe too that God's teaching me something new nowadays. A phrase kept repeating itself when I did quiet time. It was 'Shepherd's heart' Maybe it has something to do with what's happening, does it?

Heh, guess dat's it, will be updating this blog later on. Gotta get back to studying. Heh, no amount of praying would get you an A if you don't study, rite?

God Bless!