The Trip

Tomorrow will be a day I would term as 'The Trip' It will most probably be a day of meeting up some good old friends for lunch in KLCC and then just sitting around KLCC, doing some people observing and sermon writing.

Somehow, I find I've developed an interest of just hanging out in shopping complexes and observing people that walk past by (And no, it's not just the gurls, seriously *grin* Though I wonder if you guys actually do this as well, hmm). Guess it all started when I worked in Chili's and had to wait by the tables for the customers' every want and need.

Relationships never fails to get my attention. There's a wide variety of ways relationships could turn out. And I guess, at times it's quite interesting really to observe people and how do they actually react and respond to each other.

If you look clearly, there's always the couple that doesn't talk at all, the couple that is too, well, touchy feely and also the couple that's going around playing like kids in the shopping complex. You see, there are just so many possibilities in relationships and sometimes by observing others, you can learn from them.

Other than that, there's also the issue of Megasale still going on and also being in a place with a lot of people actually helps me get my mind running, instead of being at home alone, heh.

Oh yeah, for those of you who still haven't watched Alien vs Predator, don't watch it. We watched it last night, and well, it isn't a movie you want to spend your rm 10 on, unless you're a real big fan of either two. At least spend it on something of Shrek 2's quality *grin*

Okays, guess dats it. Had a great time with Kevin Tang, Audrey, Grace and Ah Ham on Tuesday. Thanks people! We should do it more often *smile* And nope, no deep thinking stuff or lame & funny jokes in this post.

God Bless and Happy holidays again~!

p/s: Still can't believe dat people said I'm 5 out of a scale of 1-4 on being talkative. Man, and I thought I was quiet. Am I not, am I not? *scratches head in amusement*

Quiet or noisy?

Ah, the finals is finally over. For many, it is a case of many papers, making the final paper so delightfully nice. However, I had only 1 paper throughout the semester (this is what you get for failing *sigh*) and so, it's the first and last paper for me. Oh yea, how's the paper? Erm, dun ask

Anyhows, would be heading to KL to release tension, eat in Burger King other than bringing out the juniors. Just a running thought, do you guys ever sit and think when you eat a burger? For example, burgers from your roadside burger stall, Mcdonalds, Burger King, KFC and stuff from Chili's and TGIF.

Hah, if you really want to taste a burger that's almost similar to those you get from Chili's and at a much cheaper price, you won't go wrong with Burger King. This is due to the fact that BK uses the same cooking technique as employed in Chili's.

Mcdonald isn't too far away, but KFC's burgers are really crap. And those roadside burger stalls? Heh, they don't even come close to what a burger is in America. Just try setting up your Ramli burger stall in America and the people will ask you what is it? *grin*

Ya, enough of burgers for today. Just another running thought. Do you guys think I'm a :
1) Quiet person
2) Oklah, not too quiet and not too noisy either
3) Kinda chatty
4) Noise maker! Nuff said (would take super strong Acme glue to keep me quiet)

Would appreciate input on this. Perhaps I would make a poll huh? *wink* Comments welcomed and appreciated!

God Bless and Happy holidays~!

Personality Tests

Heys! I'm back again! Heh, haven't gone back to hit the books yet. Soon I promise (ya, Su Chen gonna treat me to KFC when I grad! Oh yea, Joel & Fonie too! Isn't that inspiration enough?) *grin*

Anyhows, I stumbled upon this personality test site. It's a simplified version of the Keirsey's Temperament Sorter, that's been reseached on (Wazzat? hehe, I'm sure some of you don't even know what's it huh? *grin*) Anyhows, it's something that tests your personality. Really good stuff.

Anyhows, it's much more accurate than those quizilla/what's your color test/what's your bible book test/blah blah etc etc. Those are meant to well, erm, get you happy I guess. (Yea Mel, Leona & Joanne, if you gals are reading this, heh)

Do check it out. The explaination is really good and I'm dying to know what's your personality type. Here is it, just click on the Bloginality link

Enjoy~!

p/s: Time to exercise my people skills and reel in the Japanese chicks! Somehow, Olympics opened my eyes to Japanese chicks. However, Korean ones aren't too bad either.. *grin*

Now, where's that Katagana and hiragana book?

Consumed

Ever heard of the story of the communist guy? It was many years ago, when this communist wrote a tearful letter to his fiance. And in his letter, he mentioned a dream, his dream, the communist dream. He has reached a point where the dream consumes every portion of his soul, where every waking moment is consumed by the desire to spread the communist propaganda. And because of this, he can't and he won't continue their relationship. Though they were to be married soon.

At times, I do feel consumed by this dream. The dream to see the salvation of Malaysia. The dream of spiritual breakthrough happening in Malaysia. And no, it's not something that comes during a revival concert or a breakthrough camp, but it's something that consumes the very portions of my soul.

Was spending quiet time with God yesterday when again I felt God asking me, 'Leo, would you go? To be the evangelist I've called you to be' And it's not once. It's a thing that keeps repeating itself. Would I go? Would I give my life for a cause greater than this?

Many people have dreams of going overseas, going for a play or retiring happily at the age of 40. But I can't, cause every flitting moment is consumed by the dream, a desire to see a change in Malaysia. How God's gonna do it, I seriously dunno.

I have to admit, I've been distracted. At times, I find my short attention span leading me to something else. But I guess it's time to refocus. I know I live for this dream, this vision, this statement.

I believe too that God's teaching me something new nowadays. A phrase kept repeating itself when I did quiet time. It was 'Shepherd's heart' Maybe it has something to do with what's happening, does it?

Heh, guess dat's it, will be updating this blog later on. Gotta get back to studying. Heh, no amount of praying would get you an A if you don't study, rite?

God Bless!

The Final Lap

Matthew 16:24-26 'Then Jesus said to His disciples, "If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it. For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?'

Last week was a thinking week for me. I don't have much time left in Multimedia University. Straightaway after the finals, there's industrial training, which will then be followed by the 3rd semester and then graduation. And though 7 months might seem long, it's actually quite fast and before you can blink your eyes and say, 'whatchasaymynameis', it's gone!

And I kept getting this verse coming to my head. Perhaps it's God trying to tell me something, no?

Anyhows, I was just thinking, have I made an impact here while still in MMU? Have I left a mark in the Christian Fellowship? Have I done my best to bless others, help them and even be there for them? And at times I just don't know.

There must be a reason why I'm still here. 6 years in MMU (!) Could have gotten a MBA if I kept to doing Economics in HELP. And it's been a journey, a real long but exciting journey.

I still remember the times when I 1st set foot in Unitele (as MMU was known then). Lost, not knowing where to go and what to do, Sheila Jeremiah invited me to join the Christian Fellowship. And there we were, 10-12 of us that restarted the CF then. We were eventually known as the 2nd pioneers.

And it was great. Studying in the library everyday for the fear of failure and then coming home to the student house in the middle of the night, when the library closed. And it was obligatory dailly trip to the other CF houses next door to joke around, tease each other and to catch up with how everyone is doing, other than to have our Chor Tai Dee challenge (where the gals were sore losers, heh) *grin*

Of course, there were some BGR activities going on too. Some were innocent BGRs and some, not so, as we saw our CF gals getting too close to some non Christian guys. It's not that we didn't warn them, but in the end it was their choice, their lives and their walk with God. We just had to lead our own lives.

The Christian Fellowship grew as we went out of our way to invite others in. We had 38 members when I shifted to Cyber. 12 to 38, no small feat considering there were no seniors around then. Some of the gals stopped coming though, due to their relationships with well..*sigh*

Anyhows, here I am. Have I done enough? Have I taken up my cross frequently enough? Have I blessed you yet?

As I begin the last lap of my race in MMU, I hope and I pray that I can invest in people's life. God's been teaching me to view things through Christ's lenses. Perhaps that's it, to look after the needs of others and not myself. After all, it's not all about me, but Christ who lives in me. I'm willing to die to serve you, if that's possible.

Let me run the final sprint, the final 100 meters knowing that I've done my part here in MMU.

God Bless~

The Putrajaya Flour Bash : Insider story

Ah, enough of serious posts for the time being. I'm sure some of you have read Wee Liem's account of the birthday bash cum BBQ (heh, BBQ sounds like killed Pork, where BB = Babi and Q = kill *bleh*)

Coming to you is the insider account of the bashing, from the one who did all the flour, cold mineral water, tomato and finally beehoon throwing. So what actually happened?

We (Kenneth Tan and I) actually planned to have a BBQ as part of the joint CG activity early on of the semester. Somehow, it progessed to be a birthday bash for Wee Liem as well.

Eggs and flour were the initial items planned for our beloved Wee Liem. But somehow, as egging and flouring would be a real mess to clean up, we bought 2 packets of flour at rm 1.90 each in Tesco.

And thus, after everything was over and as Jo Wen was killing time by asking people for their comments, some of us were upstairs trying to light up the b'day cake we got from Berry's.

The funny thing was that we didn't have the lighter and we couldn't light it up, but Jo Wen didn't know that and after signalling for the lights to be killed, he started with the b'day song only to realise the cake wasn't there! (duh...)

And so, it was an awkward moment of silence. Everyone was waiting for the cake. Somehow, we found the lighter and was about 2 steps down the stairs when Kenneth Tan mentioned, 'Flour!'

And somehow, we planned for me and Kenneth to flour Wee Liem after Grace had taken the cake down and in the midst of the B'day song. It was kinda good too to find Wee Liem sms-ing innocently with his back turned to us.

So then, while everyone was busy singing the birthday song, we brought out the flour, tore both the packets and *POW* went Wee Liem! And yea, I was the culprit who did all the water, tomato ketchup and bee hoon on Wee Liem. It so happened that they were all within reach and well, flour is never enough huh? *grin*

The highlight of the flour bash? An unforgettable one when everyone was lined up for a group photo. As the cameraman shouted,'Ready?' a crazy thought went through my head. There was a group of bashable people and the packet of flour was still kinda full.

So then, as the cameraman went '3..2..on' and the voice was dragging when I flour-ed over everyone who were nicely posing for the group photo! Hah, how's that for a b'day bash?


Now, hmm, where do I hide on my birthday so I'm not bashed in return? Time to turn invisble I guess. I can be invisible when nobody's looking! *Blehhh*

Numbing it

Sometimes emotions are something that's hard to understand. It runs wild at times when we least expect it to and when that happens it's just so easy to get into the 'self pity' mode.

Wonder why I mentioned about emotions? Well, guess I'm learning to bring it under control, just like a cowboy reining in a wild horse.

Today was a really great day. From the start, meeting up Kenneth & Eric early in the morning to get stuff for Wee Liem's b'day to an expensive 'chap fan' lunch (eesh, kena conned by the chap fan rice uncle). It was followed by shopping in Tesco, cleaning the house, marinating the food and then waiting for everyone to arrive for the BBQ party to start.

BBQ was a blast with crazy kodak moments with Kenneth, Charis, Mel, Kae Ee and Wee Liem doing crazy shots on our digital cameras. Some we later bombed Wee Liem with flour, water, tomato ketchup and bee hoon, leaving us with a big mess to clear up.

But somehow, the emotions button clicked halfway through and though I tried my best, everything seemed to go down the drain then. (Ah, I should just blame it on the lack of glucose, heh) And there I was, smiling when turmoil seem to run through the emotions.

Someone mentioned afterwards that talking about it would be good. But somehow, somethings are better left unsaid, unheard of and kept in the heart. After all, it might give a bad outcome if it's out.

Just at times, we're faced with an option when our emotions run wild. Do we numb it with all our games, studies, movies and everything else? Or do we bring it and lay it upon the cross? All our hurts, broken hopes, broken dreams and pain.

It's always easier to numb it, but bringing it to God helps us grow in Christ. God help me go through less of these storms and tornadoes of life~

God Bless

Reaffirming the call

Isaiah 6:8 'Also I heard the voice of the Lord, saying: "Whom shall I send, And who will go for Us?" Then I said, "Here am I! Send me."'

Somehow meeting up with my senior Pastor, Ps Henry, is always an awkward situation. There he would be, with his booming, fatherly voice going, 'Good morning Leo! Are you still interested about full-time ministry?' And it would always be in the main sanctuary of the church, in the full view of others. Heh, now what would you give to avoid that question? (especially when everyone seems to be around, haiihh~)

Anyhow, I guess the question is not the issue of commitment, but an issue of timing. Been learning a lot of things these past few weeks. Guess I've grown an inch or two spiritually too. (Yah, you expected the word 'sideways' huh?)

One lesson learnt was the fact you can't make people like you, especially if they don't (Heh, simple lesson huh?) In fact, every friendship work on a 2 way basis. We hang out with those we like, and vice versa, people that like us (on the basis of our personality, wit, humor and perhaps companionship) hang out with us.

We should not try to change ourselves to suit others as that's crap, but we can try to smoothen our rough edges. Heh, like for example, being more sensitive to others, being crappy/lame at the right time, etc etc. After all, life is about learning to live with others, right?

Another lesson learnt is the fact that we can only advice and pray our friends when we see them in a situation that might be harmful to them. After all, we care for their wellbeing. But sometimes, it's all up to them. It's their life, their decision and their choices. Doing more might just harm the friendship, wouldn't it?

Ah, back to full-time ministry. Was at FGA KL when they gave an altar call for those wanting to give their life to serve God. But, being where I am now, it's not about going out there. I've done that many times. But it's the issue of living my life dailly for Christ, dying to myself in order to life for Christ. After all, it's a long run, not a 100 meters dash.

Guess that's it for now. Till something crazy happens (like a flying cow over Cyberjaya or something like dat, heh *grin*) or when God puts something in this stubborn cranium skull of mine, God Bless~

p/s: People and relationships are all part and parcel of full time ministry. After all, your congregation is human after all right? *grin*

Friends

Was just looking back at my life recently. It's been 5 years plus since I registered as a student with MMU. And somehow throughout this time, I've drifted apart from the many friends I have. Guess at times, there are friends that go a certain portion of the road with you, and there are also friends that stick with you through thick and thin huh?

Did some calling up of old friends with the phonebook I have. And it seems that there's a barrier with those friends you don't keep in touch for quite some time. There's just a feeling of not knowing where to start. Conversations seem a little awkward. People seem hesitant to open up.

But I guess it's a sacrifice thats needed to be made. Most of my old friends meet up on Saturday nights and for many years now, Saturday nights has strictly been a time to serve the church. And after awhile, they kinda got fed up to call. After all, I wouldn't be able to make it.

Anyhows, enough on the sad note. Haihhh, will try to meet up with my friends on Saturday afternoons next time, as an effort to catch up with them.

On a brighter note, Thirst CG was a blast! We had a great time with lame jokes and bashing each other up. (Ahh~ Even the gurls ganged up to bash me~ Haiihh) At the end of the day, we wrote comments on each others back. Interestingly, here's some of them:

-Lame guy, wanna BULK you, but you're enthusiastic and very helpful!
-I pray that you don't get BULK so often >:) God Bless man!
-Real lame-o, but love ya!
-Forever the lame!! Don't ever change :)
-BULK!
1) For being too lame sometimes
2) For trying to be funnie
3) For being quite a nice guy

Guess you can tell by now that I'm the king of lame jokes, heheheh. It's actually a skill to be learnt you know? Not everyone can graduate with a 1st class in well, being lame. Wanna be my student? *grin*

p/s: What's BULK? It's BEAT UP LEO KOO. Just a phrase coined up by my demented friends. Haiihh~ It must be due to the sad environment of Cyberjaya.

Bitterness

Hebrews 12:15 'See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many'

Was doing some blog surfing today when I came upon some blogs that spoke with so much hurt, anger, frustrations and bitterness. Bitterness, something I'm so familiar with.

What's with bitterness anyway? Bitterness is unforgiveness that has festered itself and in itself is a sin. But sometimes, life is so much easier to be in the state of bitterness and frustrations. After all, it's familiar ground to settle in and after awhile, you sort of prefer to stay bitter than to get out and get a life.

Need an example of a bitter person? I was once bitter. And in a way, bitterness overtook every single part of me, every single thought was consumed by rage and bitterness. I virtually lost myself there. Friends became a place to complain instead of having fun. Haiihh, if only I knew better then.

Somehow, one day in the EARC 2002 camp in PD, God sorta short-circuited me and woke me up. And somehow, God got this into the thick stubborn cranium skull of mine during a moment in camp when I was feeling down and bitter about everything. And I suddenly came to realization that God was trying to tell me,'Look, there are people that are nice to you, you're not a reject or a loser. Even the nice pretty girls are talking to you!' Guess that the last part of the message had the effect God wanted huh? Heh.

Anyhows, it's been quite a trip so far. One year and 2 months since the day I decided it's enough, it's time to grow up and let the past go.

True, at times I still have to fight the pasts, the hurts and the pain. At other times, I had to acknowledge the fact I've got all my life screwed up and it wasn't easy to learn talking, relating and joking with others again.

It was and still is hard. There were a lot of times of hurts and tears when I just don't comprehend what's happening around me or when I mis-read some people's reaction. And staying bitter seemed the easy way.

But looking back, I thank God for what I've been through. Life is so much more fun now, so much more colorful, so much more joy. And I begin to find myself enjoying it everyday, instead of being frightened again by the chance of getting hurt.

It's tough brother, but you can do it too.

God Bless~