Was at church really early today, heh, guess my internal alarms came on although I wanted to continue sleeping. (Thank God tomorrow is a holiday though, heheh) Anyhow, after getting the church ready with Pastor and Chee Foo, my stomach started growling. Woah, hunger struck! (Hmm, and to think of it, I walloped quite a number of bbq-ed chicken wings plus slices of pizzas the night before)
Anyway, Pastor pointed me to the nearest dimsum shop nearby, with the caution,'Be quick ok?' Reaching there, I was surprised to the a fully packed restaurant with a huge crowd(!) (Heh, it shows that it's a good dim sum shop. Bad shops seldom have that much of people, no?)
And there was the Lam family taking their dim sum breakfast as well. I had hoped to just greet them and find an empty table for myself, though Mr Lam vigorously suggested me joining them.
'Come join us young man'
'Nah, it's ok *smiles*'
'Really, comela, don't have to be shy one'
'Erm, nolah, thanks for the offer anyway'
So then, I sat on a table by myself. Was pretty good dim sum (heheh, comparable to the ones in Serdang) The Siew Mais were good though, but chicken feet was just ordinary. Even tapaued extra Siew Mais for Charis & Mel (thinking I could surprise them with something different for breakfast before church)
However, the tapauing took awfully long (I had asked them to count the bill the moment the Siew Mai arrived) and I began fidgeting. Heheh, I had to rush back to church for the morning prayer before the worship started.
Though, when the siew mais came, the waiter casually mentioned 'Kai cho loh'-'Paid in full'. And I was going, 'What?' And then only I looked over and noticed the smiling faces of Mr Lam and his family. Man, paiseh man (hmm, the waiters wouldn't want to accept any money from me *sigh*)
Thank you Lord for the awesome breakfast today~!
Sunday, October 31, 2004
A letter
Got this letter from a friend recently. It's good to see her finally becoming a youth pastor. It's been quite a while since we've known each other, and she's one of those that inspires me with her zeal (haha, sometimes she scares me too).
Beneath all my doubts, my questioning and my recommitments, she has remained strong and ever faithful. 'Wow!', is at times not sufficient enough for me to describe her. Knowing her, I'm sure God will provide her with a good husband (she broke up with her non-Christian boyfriend back when she learnt that it's not of the Lord)
I dunno, but I've the feeling that one day, she'll be one of the prime figures of revival. May the Lord use her mightily one day *grin*
Inspired
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: "Evelyn; Mary Kang"
Subject: farewell - bye bye
Dear friends,
Precious greetings in the name of Jesus!
It's like a century ago since I last wrote you an email on things happening in my life :-) However, I am glad that I can finally spare some time to type you this email - hopefully with as much details as possible for you to continue to support me and cheer me on (in this faith journey) with your prayer and encouragement.
I am typing this email with my HP/Compaq palmtop, hence I find it's quite a struggle to let my fingers fight to press on the right alphabet buttons here :p Just ignore the typo please.
I've always wanted to tell you *something* and I'm happy to tell via this email --- you have been a blessing in my journey of pursuing Jesus. You might think that this is probably another mass email, but I can assure you that it is NOT. I know who you are (who am I sending this email to) and I smile when I thought of you - the time we spent together in worship, fellowship, chit-chatting, MSN/Yahoo/ICQ messaging, how we enjoyed serving God together in CF/church/cell group/office, I want you to know that you are important to me and the fact that you are getting this email from me is because I love you in Christ, I remember you and yes, I *S*M*I*L*E* when your name flashes over my mind. :-)
God has been good to me, as He always does. Time flies and I have been serving in Semarak Revival Centre/Jesus Heals Ministries International as both a full time ministry staff and secretary for almost 2 years. I was involved in prayer & intercession, ministry to the sick, evangelism to unbelievers, creative ministry (audio visual production, leaflet design, website, etc), resource ministry (consignment of Pastor Jean Lim's books/CDs/VCDs/DVDs,Cassette Tapes and many other items), planning and organization of events, cleaning duties (i.e. months of cleaning the toilets x 12)... the list can go on and on. In my moments of feeling weak, I have shed tears many times, especially in my initial months.
Once, I was busy packing stock/resource materials for outstation Jesus Heals trips and being new (and alone)... I was just at lost, knowing that I probably had to spend another "many hours" packing probably 10-12 boxes, probably 100-120kg of items for sale... looking at the stock room with thousands of things inside, I sat down and wept. I did not know what to do - I did not know how to pack, I did not know many things and un-trained to do many things that were piling up on my desk. There were also times when I got blue-black marks on my body because things fell on me or I accidently cut myself when I was cutting boxes... yea, there were times when I felt like shouting at my PC at work too (it moves very slowly and always MIA - shut down by itself...) At the same time, I missed home a lot. Here in Malaysia, without my family by my side, I really come to understand that Jesus is my best compaion. I am staying with an Iban family (how I thank God for them!) and it's a blessing as I have always loved to stay with a family instead of staying alone or with other church (single) staff. Due to my commitment to serve with the busy schedules I have, I could not visit home as frequent as I thought I would be able to. I had cried when I thought of daddy and mommy at home, when I thought of my siblings or even the young babies (nieces + nephew) back in Sg. I started serving God when I was 22 and at a twinkling of eyes, I am 24!
I am very grateful that as time passes by, I grew stronger. God is the strength of my heart. I have learnt spiritual principles as well as practical lessons i.e: give me a box of things and I may be able to guess the weight correctly, ha! God shapes and moulds me esp. to build up godly character in me. I am in my journey of learning and growing in Christ and O, how thankful I am to God that He's not finished with me yet. He is ever transforming me from glory to glory, from faith to faith. Praises be unto the name of Jesus!
2 years have gone. It's a good time spent here. It's the most precious 2 years in my walk with God since I accepted Christ in 1998. I thank God that every year, it is getting better! Hallelujah!
I am leaving Semarak, leaving Malaysia and will be returning to Singapore next week.
On Sunday, 24/10/04, in our 8pm service, Pastor Jean had made a public annoucement to the church about my next move - to be serving in Crown of Glory Church in Singapore. I was given opportunity to share with the church - I didn't expect it and wasn't too sure on what to share at first. I thanked God for His everlasting goodness upon my life that He allows me to serve Him as there is no higher calling, no greater honor than for me to serve the King of kings. I also thanked Pastor Jean, the leaders, staff and church members for their kindness and love to me. They have loved me, received me, welcomed me and accepted me to serve here when the Lord released me from my past circular job to serve Him on full-time basis. They have loved me, cared for me, trained me and imparted faith and inspired me to always serve God with my best during my stay here. I have a good family in Christ here, how God loves me!
I just so wish to tell you face to face that my journey in answering His call has been good, in fact it's been very good - The Lord has supplied to me all my needs, He has answered my prayer, He is with me and His love without measure always touches me. I am madly in love with Jesus. When I was telling the congregation on that Sunday about what I'd just told you, I could see that many were crying. I was with tears too... but soon everyone burst out in laughter when one of my co-worker passed me a box of tissue and I said "Hmmm... I don't need a box..." ha!
After my sharing, the church staff surrounded me while Pastor Jean released me and blessed me to move on in ministry and as many people had expected, I shed tears of joy. It was a long prayer and prophecy given upon my life. May the Lord fulfills the prophecy that I will be a soul-winner and attract young ones to God, PTL!
In my 2-year of ministry experience here, I was not really involved in the youth work. But, my heart has always been burdened for the young people. The Word of God like burning in my bones that I must tell them about Jesus. My passion is to serve the young ones. I got saved when I was a college student (17 year-old) and I had had many powerful encounters with God as a youth. I had always dreamed of serving the youths - esp. as there were prophecies given to me that I will be serving God in the area of youth ministry. The Lord gave me understanding that my 2-year here was almost like a confinement period - I was not in touch with the youths and I was tested if my heart desire and the calling to serve the youths was real. But, O how I thank God that the fire is still burning. I have a destiny that I know I shall fulfill. Though the vision tarries but it shall come to past. I often told myself, "just wait upon the Lord..."
I am ready to run with the vision now. I know that He who has called me is faithful to complete the good work that He's begun in me. He is able to keep me from falling and present me faultless before Christ when I meet Him face to face. PTL! My next move to Singapore, serving as a youth pastor as the Lord leads will help me yield to the Lord more and continue to walk before Him with humility, gentleness and all that qualities that I need as a bondservant of Christ. His love is so amazing, so divine that it demands my all. Let Him leads me on with His hands. I cannot do anything apart from my beloved Jesus.
My current contact no. +6012-6143788 will still be in use after I leave for Sg though I will get a new Sg hp no. after I settle down there next weekend. Please keep me in your prayer and I want to let you know that you are in my heart and my prayer - sometimes consistently, sometimes as the Spirit blows your name to my mind :-)
The Lord is good. When I came back to Malaysia, I knew it will be for a period of 2 years. Knowing all times and seasons, God opened door for me to serve in Sg as He brings me back there. (Part of the reasons of I leaving Semarak is also because I am a Singapore PR hence it is not advisable for me to stay away from the country for any longer period, else I would have difficulties in renewing my PR status)
I love the Lord with my life. May God continues to make me shine for Christ. :-)
Visit these URL if you have time?
Full-Time Ministry Calling1
http://www.mychristiansite.com/personal/evelynkang/calling.html
Full-Time Ministry Calling2
http://www.mychristiansite.com/personal/evelynkang/FullTime.htm
with love,
Evelyn Kang
=====
Jim Elliot - "He is no fool to give what he cannot keep and keep what
he cannot lose"
Beneath all my doubts, my questioning and my recommitments, she has remained strong and ever faithful. 'Wow!', is at times not sufficient enough for me to describe her. Knowing her, I'm sure God will provide her with a good husband (she broke up with her non-Christian boyfriend back when she learnt that it's not of the Lord)
I dunno, but I've the feeling that one day, she'll be one of the prime figures of revival. May the Lord use her mightily one day *grin*
Inspired
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: "Evelyn; Mary Kang"
Subject: farewell - bye bye
Dear friends,
Precious greetings in the name of Jesus!
It's like a century ago since I last wrote you an email on things happening in my life :-) However, I am glad that I can finally spare some time to type you this email - hopefully with as much details as possible for you to continue to support me and cheer me on (in this faith journey) with your prayer and encouragement.
I am typing this email with my HP/Compaq palmtop, hence I find it's quite a struggle to let my fingers fight to press on the right alphabet buttons here :p Just ignore the typo please.
I've always wanted to tell you *something* and I'm happy to tell via this email --- you have been a blessing in my journey of pursuing Jesus. You might think that this is probably another mass email, but I can assure you that it is NOT. I know who you are (who am I sending this email to) and I smile when I thought of you - the time we spent together in worship, fellowship, chit-chatting, MSN/Yahoo/ICQ messaging, how we enjoyed serving God together in CF/church/cell group/office, I want you to know that you are important to me and the fact that you are getting this email from me is because I love you in Christ, I remember you and yes, I *S*M*I*L*E* when your name flashes over my mind. :-)
God has been good to me, as He always does. Time flies and I have been serving in Semarak Revival Centre/Jesus Heals Ministries International as both a full time ministry staff and secretary for almost 2 years. I was involved in prayer & intercession, ministry to the sick, evangelism to unbelievers, creative ministry (audio visual production, leaflet design, website, etc), resource ministry (consignment of Pastor Jean Lim's books/CDs/VCDs/DVDs,Cassette Tapes and many other items), planning and organization of events, cleaning duties (i.e. months of cleaning the toilets x 12)... the list can go on and on. In my moments of feeling weak, I have shed tears many times, especially in my initial months.
Once, I was busy packing stock/resource materials for outstation Jesus Heals trips and being new (and alone)... I was just at lost, knowing that I probably had to spend another "many hours" packing probably 10-12 boxes, probably 100-120kg of items for sale... looking at the stock room with thousands of things inside, I sat down and wept. I did not know what to do - I did not know how to pack, I did not know many things and un-trained to do many things that were piling up on my desk. There were also times when I got blue-black marks on my body because things fell on me or I accidently cut myself when I was cutting boxes... yea, there were times when I felt like shouting at my PC at work too (it moves very slowly and always MIA - shut down by itself...) At the same time, I missed home a lot. Here in Malaysia, without my family by my side, I really come to understand that Jesus is my best compaion. I am staying with an Iban family (how I thank God for them!) and it's a blessing as I have always loved to stay with a family instead of staying alone or with other church (single) staff. Due to my commitment to serve with the busy schedules I have, I could not visit home as frequent as I thought I would be able to. I had cried when I thought of daddy and mommy at home, when I thought of my siblings or even the young babies (nieces + nephew) back in Sg. I started serving God when I was 22 and at a twinkling of eyes, I am 24!
I am very grateful that as time passes by, I grew stronger. God is the strength of my heart. I have learnt spiritual principles as well as practical lessons i.e: give me a box of things and I may be able to guess the weight correctly, ha! God shapes and moulds me esp. to build up godly character in me. I am in my journey of learning and growing in Christ and O, how thankful I am to God that He's not finished with me yet. He is ever transforming me from glory to glory, from faith to faith. Praises be unto the name of Jesus!
2 years have gone. It's a good time spent here. It's the most precious 2 years in my walk with God since I accepted Christ in 1998. I thank God that every year, it is getting better! Hallelujah!
I am leaving Semarak, leaving Malaysia and will be returning to Singapore next week.
On Sunday, 24/10/04, in our 8pm service, Pastor Jean had made a public annoucement to the church about my next move - to be serving in Crown of Glory Church in Singapore. I was given opportunity to share with the church - I didn't expect it and wasn't too sure on what to share at first. I thanked God for His everlasting goodness upon my life that He allows me to serve Him as there is no higher calling, no greater honor than for me to serve the King of kings. I also thanked Pastor Jean, the leaders, staff and church members for their kindness and love to me. They have loved me, received me, welcomed me and accepted me to serve here when the Lord released me from my past circular job to serve Him on full-time basis. They have loved me, cared for me, trained me and imparted faith and inspired me to always serve God with my best during my stay here. I have a good family in Christ here, how God loves me!
I just so wish to tell you face to face that my journey in answering His call has been good, in fact it's been very good - The Lord has supplied to me all my needs, He has answered my prayer, He is with me and His love without measure always touches me. I am madly in love with Jesus. When I was telling the congregation on that Sunday about what I'd just told you, I could see that many were crying. I was with tears too... but soon everyone burst out in laughter when one of my co-worker passed me a box of tissue and I said "Hmmm... I don't need a box..." ha!
After my sharing, the church staff surrounded me while Pastor Jean released me and blessed me to move on in ministry and as many people had expected, I shed tears of joy. It was a long prayer and prophecy given upon my life. May the Lord fulfills the prophecy that I will be a soul-winner and attract young ones to God, PTL!
In my 2-year of ministry experience here, I was not really involved in the youth work. But, my heart has always been burdened for the young people. The Word of God like burning in my bones that I must tell them about Jesus. My passion is to serve the young ones. I got saved when I was a college student (17 year-old) and I had had many powerful encounters with God as a youth. I had always dreamed of serving the youths - esp. as there were prophecies given to me that I will be serving God in the area of youth ministry. The Lord gave me understanding that my 2-year here was almost like a confinement period - I was not in touch with the youths and I was tested if my heart desire and the calling to serve the youths was real. But, O how I thank God that the fire is still burning. I have a destiny that I know I shall fulfill. Though the vision tarries but it shall come to past. I often told myself, "just wait upon the Lord..."
I am ready to run with the vision now. I know that He who has called me is faithful to complete the good work that He's begun in me. He is able to keep me from falling and present me faultless before Christ when I meet Him face to face. PTL! My next move to Singapore, serving as a youth pastor as the Lord leads will help me yield to the Lord more and continue to walk before Him with humility, gentleness and all that qualities that I need as a bondservant of Christ. His love is so amazing, so divine that it demands my all. Let Him leads me on with His hands. I cannot do anything apart from my beloved Jesus.
My current contact no. +6012-6143788 will still be in use after I leave for Sg though I will get a new Sg hp no. after I settle down there next weekend. Please keep me in your prayer and I want to let you know that you are in my heart and my prayer - sometimes consistently, sometimes as the Spirit blows your name to my mind :-)
The Lord is good. When I came back to Malaysia, I knew it will be for a period of 2 years. Knowing all times and seasons, God opened door for me to serve in Sg as He brings me back there. (Part of the reasons of I leaving Semarak is also because I am a Singapore PR hence it is not advisable for me to stay away from the country for any longer period, else I would have difficulties in renewing my PR status)
I love the Lord with my life. May God continues to make me shine for Christ. :-)
Visit these URL if you have time?
Full-Time Ministry Calling1
http://www.mychristiansite.com/personal/evelynkang/calling.html
Full-Time Ministry Calling2
http://www.mychristiansite.com/personal/evelynkang/FullTime.htm
with love,
Evelyn Kang
=====
Jim Elliot - "He is no fool to give what he cannot keep and keep what
he cannot lose"
Wednesday, October 27, 2004
Unto the soccer scene
Here's a change. I'm gonna write a bit about soccer (ah, don't worry, it's not gonna be a soccer blog or a soccer fan's blog, heheheh). So what about soccer? Is it a beautiful game? Or is it just 20 adults chasing a ball all over the pitch?
I was never a soccer fan from young. My 1st glimpse of it was in 1990, when I had a wager with my uncle on which team would win the World Cup. I picked Argentina, which surprisingly reached the finals. Hmm, winning the bet would have gotten me a Transformers toy though, heheh.
I never played soccer while young too. I had lofty ambitions of being a national badminton player then (ah, and if it came true, I would be Wong Choon Han's teammate by now). It was all okay until my best friend then trashed me in straight games. Oh yea, she played for the district though. (Ah, met her recently too. And the only thing I could say was 'Wowwwwww', with a dropping jaw. Haha, no saliva though)
So, what about the soccer scene? No, it's not your Malaysian Soccer League I'm talking about (ah, you can get try to pay me, but I still won't watch, hehe) but EPL, the best supported league worldwide.
I'm a Liverpool/Tottenham fan. Been a Tottenham fan ever since I saw Gascoigne play (erm, Gascoigne looked like a clown then. But then he still looks like a clown now. Hmm, guess that's what caught my attention though) Liverpool came recently though.
And yeah, if you ask me, I don't support any of the big 3 teams (Manchester United, Arsenal and Chelsea). Partially cause their managers have egos as big as the latest Toyota Mpv out there, the Altezza. Another thing is well, everybody else supports them, so why follow? Heheh
Why do most guys like soccer? Well, I guess though it's a dumb game, it's still beautiful. No two games are alike. And yea, instead of drama, we guys prefer something else we can relate too (like gals and their dailly chinese/korean drama, or perhaps Friends too, heheh)
And how about you? Soccer my friend? We can always have soccer over a cuppa coffee.
God Bless~!
I was never a soccer fan from young. My 1st glimpse of it was in 1990, when I had a wager with my uncle on which team would win the World Cup. I picked Argentina, which surprisingly reached the finals. Hmm, winning the bet would have gotten me a Transformers toy though, heheh.
I never played soccer while young too. I had lofty ambitions of being a national badminton player then (ah, and if it came true, I would be Wong Choon Han's teammate by now). It was all okay until my best friend then trashed me in straight games. Oh yea, she played for the district though. (Ah, met her recently too. And the only thing I could say was 'Wowwwwww', with a dropping jaw. Haha, no saliva though)
So, what about the soccer scene? No, it's not your Malaysian Soccer League I'm talking about (ah, you can get try to pay me, but I still won't watch, hehe) but EPL, the best supported league worldwide.
I'm a Liverpool/Tottenham fan. Been a Tottenham fan ever since I saw Gascoigne play (erm, Gascoigne looked like a clown then. But then he still looks like a clown now. Hmm, guess that's what caught my attention though) Liverpool came recently though.
And yeah, if you ask me, I don't support any of the big 3 teams (Manchester United, Arsenal and Chelsea). Partially cause their managers have egos as big as the latest Toyota Mpv out there, the Altezza. Another thing is well, everybody else supports them, so why follow? Heheh
Why do most guys like soccer? Well, I guess though it's a dumb game, it's still beautiful. No two games are alike. And yea, instead of drama, we guys prefer something else we can relate too (like gals and their dailly chinese/korean drama, or perhaps Friends too, heheh)
And how about you? Soccer my friend? We can always have soccer over a cuppa coffee.
God Bless~!
Sunday, October 24, 2004
Quarter-life crisis
Got this from Jason Ding's forwarded msg on XmmuCFers. Considering I would be a quarter of a century old in 2 months and most of my friends are already that age, here goes:
-----------------------------
For those in their twenty-something's...This puts it all into words perfectly. They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis."
It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may or may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two,but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.
You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones.
What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.
You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren't so great after all. You are beginning to understand yourself and what you want and do not want.
Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging a bit more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and add things to your list of what is acceptable and what is not.
You are insecure and then secure.You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life.You feel alone and scared and confused.Suddenly change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.
You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough to get to know better. You love someone but maybe love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you are not a bad person.
One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic.You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.
You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!
What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out. Send this to your twenty-something friends...Maybe it will help some one feel like they are not alone in the state of confusion that is our post grad. years!!!
-----------------------------
For those in their twenty-something's...This puts it all into words perfectly. They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis."
It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may or may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two,but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.
You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones.
What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.
You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren't so great after all. You are beginning to understand yourself and what you want and do not want.
Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging a bit more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and add things to your list of what is acceptable and what is not.
You are insecure and then secure.You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life.You feel alone and scared and confused.Suddenly change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.
You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough to get to know better. You love someone but maybe love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you are not a bad person.
One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic.You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.
You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!
What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out. Send this to your twenty-something friends...Maybe it will help some one feel like they are not alone in the state of confusion that is our post grad. years!!!
Saturday, October 23, 2004
Changed
I've changed, really. Just the other day, Pastor Joanne mentioned about us trying out the DISC test as a CF, and there I was mentioning to Charis that I've done it before. And when I mentioned that I was a D=I, she was like, 'Wooah, really?' (haha, D = domineering people. Kinda scary prospect though)
Anyhow, when the graph was plotted out, I found I am actually an I/S/D. Wow! That was a far cry from having an extreme graph previously. Perhaps God's ever changing, moulding and making us more and more into the image He wants us to be.
I distinctly remember a period of time where I was loud for the sake of being loud. It was a hard period of time, where I felt I didn't fit in the CF, church and even in classes. And after CF, I would usually hide myself in a corner of the FOE building not knowing what I was feeling. But I could remember a distinct thought going through my head at that time. The thought that says, 'Leo, you don't have to be loud or noisy to be loved' It was a struggle.
I guess that was made worse with my lack sense of self esteem then and also the past that kept hounding me. Things weren't made easier when a supposedly good friend in church told me, 'Leo, you need to chase after God more, then you'll have more friends' It was an equation that did not make much sense. If I wasn't a Christian, does that mean that the Christians in church would reject me?
And it was something that hindered me from forming better relationships with others. When something does not work out well (or as well as I thought) I would read my bible even more, or perhaps absorb more Christian books (like Phillip Yancey, Lee Strobel, Tommy Tenney). But there was the aspect of people skills, of fun & spontaneity that I was not told about.
Anyhow, as I began to settle in Foursquare, Pastor Jacs kept mentioning to me,'We love you, don't ever forget that'. And at times, I squirmed uncomfortably. It was a far cry from being told in my previous church,'We just can't love you'
As time passed though, I found myself coming out of my shell, of what I tried to potray so hard but failed (used to go around with the thought that I'm Leo the macho. I won't cry in front of others) I found myself just being me, instead of trying to impress others & gain their friendships.
I dunno if there's anyone of you out there feeling the same way. That at times, people don't accept you. That you have to put on a mask, just to be accepted. Remember that Christ has died on the cross to set you free from your past, your hurts, your failures.
Just surrender it all to Christ & you'll see the difference He'll make
God Bless~
p/s: I/S guys are supposedly nice people. Anyone wanna date me? Nahhhh~! Heheheh
Anyhow, when the graph was plotted out, I found I am actually an I/S/D. Wow! That was a far cry from having an extreme graph previously. Perhaps God's ever changing, moulding and making us more and more into the image He wants us to be.
I distinctly remember a period of time where I was loud for the sake of being loud. It was a hard period of time, where I felt I didn't fit in the CF, church and even in classes. And after CF, I would usually hide myself in a corner of the FOE building not knowing what I was feeling. But I could remember a distinct thought going through my head at that time. The thought that says, 'Leo, you don't have to be loud or noisy to be loved' It was a struggle.
I guess that was made worse with my lack sense of self esteem then and also the past that kept hounding me. Things weren't made easier when a supposedly good friend in church told me, 'Leo, you need to chase after God more, then you'll have more friends' It was an equation that did not make much sense. If I wasn't a Christian, does that mean that the Christians in church would reject me?
And it was something that hindered me from forming better relationships with others. When something does not work out well (or as well as I thought) I would read my bible even more, or perhaps absorb more Christian books (like Phillip Yancey, Lee Strobel, Tommy Tenney). But there was the aspect of people skills, of fun & spontaneity that I was not told about.
Anyhow, as I began to settle in Foursquare, Pastor Jacs kept mentioning to me,'We love you, don't ever forget that'. And at times, I squirmed uncomfortably. It was a far cry from being told in my previous church,'We just can't love you'
As time passed though, I found myself coming out of my shell, of what I tried to potray so hard but failed (used to go around with the thought that I'm Leo the macho. I won't cry in front of others) I found myself just being me, instead of trying to impress others & gain their friendships.
I dunno if there's anyone of you out there feeling the same way. That at times, people don't accept you. That you have to put on a mask, just to be accepted. Remember that Christ has died on the cross to set you free from your past, your hurts, your failures.
Just surrender it all to Christ & you'll see the difference He'll make
God Bless~
p/s: I/S guys are supposedly nice people. Anyone wanna date me? Nahhhh~! Heheheh
Friday, October 22, 2004
Wasabe Madness
Just the other day we (Hong Aun & yours truly) decided to come up with something more exciting for our weekly CG ice breaker. Truly enough, we had some crazy games these few weeks (toothpaste emptying game, Water in cup game, heheh, truly evil games as Audrey put it), but this was different. This was wasabi! (ah, and if you happen to be a Ryoko Hirosue fan, she acted in the excellent movie with the same name)
It didn't actually start off with wasabi. We actually planned to do the ice cream game yet again, but it somehow evolved to wasabi and ice cream and finally, wasabi in biscuits *evil grin*
We started off innocently enough with the brain twister 'Hi, I'm Harry' game, and then proceeded with the nerve wrecking variation of the paper, scissors and stone game (which I bet provided the most entertainment, heheh) and finally, the few of us decided that, 'Hey, that wasn't enough. Let's get high with wasabi(!)'
Kae Ee started the ball rolling, getting high on wasabi. (I remember him mentioning something like,'Ooh, it's in my brains!' hehehe) And watching him, me and Hong Aun decided to have a go too. Haze, who was actually kinda reluctant to join us and was sitting by the corner calling us 'mad people' finally decided to have a try
'Is it ok? How much do I have to put?'
'Erm, some more la. Not enough la'
'Really? Is this enough?'
'No, not quite. More, a bit more *grinning*'
*Haze scoops up more wasabi into her spoon*
'Enough?'
'Yea, heheh'
*Haze eats the wasabi*
....
....
'Ooohhh!'
Madness, truly madness
p/s: Should get wasabi from Sushi King next time. Got this one around from Giant during lunch break. Sadly though, Giant's wasabi lacks the 'Ooh' factor, heheh
It didn't actually start off with wasabi. We actually planned to do the ice cream game yet again, but it somehow evolved to wasabi and ice cream and finally, wasabi in biscuits *evil grin*
We started off innocently enough with the brain twister 'Hi, I'm Harry' game, and then proceeded with the nerve wrecking variation of the paper, scissors and stone game (which I bet provided the most entertainment, heheh) and finally, the few of us decided that, 'Hey, that wasn't enough. Let's get high with wasabi(!)'
Kae Ee started the ball rolling, getting high on wasabi. (I remember him mentioning something like,'Ooh, it's in my brains!' hehehe) And watching him, me and Hong Aun decided to have a go too. Haze, who was actually kinda reluctant to join us and was sitting by the corner calling us 'mad people' finally decided to have a try
'Is it ok? How much do I have to put?'
'Erm, some more la. Not enough la'
'Really? Is this enough?'
'No, not quite. More, a bit more *grinning*'
*Haze scoops up more wasabi into her spoon*
'Enough?'
'Yea, heheh'
*Haze eats the wasabi*
....
....
'Ooohhh!'
Madness, truly madness
p/s: Should get wasabi from Sushi King next time. Got this one around from Giant during lunch break. Sadly though, Giant's wasabi lacks the 'Ooh' factor, heheh
Monday, October 18, 2004
On the issue of friends
Lately I've been thinking a lot about friends and the friendships I have. Being the extrovert I am, I find myself constantly making new friends and yet struggling to keep in touch with the old friends I have. Friends are important to me, and well, it would break my heart to find a friend suddenly cold without much reason.
It was pretty interesting then to find that some readers of the Star actually wrote about the same issue, Friendship in today's newspaper (check out the Star, 17th October 2004). Are friendships really important to all of us? Can we survive without friends?
Nowadays, I find myself constantly evaluating who's my friend and who's not. I ponder on who can I trust, who can I share with, but also who can I enjoy their company without feeling awkward. And then, I wonder if I'm the only one who's looking for true friends who care and yet are themselves.
Talking to John about this, I (or rather, we) reached a conclusion that I can't possibly be everybody's friend as that would mean I wouldn't really be anybody's friend. There's a law of quality & quantity time here. I have only 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and 365 days a year, and not all are free time for friends either (yea, especially when you've started working *sigh*)
Thus, I do need to choose who do I actually spend time with, instead of trying to hit blindly with a badminton racket that spells 'Let's make friends' (though at times, I feel it's unfair to not actually make friends with certain people. Just that it gets tiring to try to get a friendship to work when you're the only one doing everything)
And with that, I do feel that I need to keep in touch with some old, good friends I have. Some I haven't met in ages as it's embarassing to tell others I haven't actually graduated from University. And the time apart sometimes slowly drives us apart. It's kinda sad to be lost for things to talk about when we finally meet up and get done with the pleasantries (which include all the crap, jokes and humour)
Someone once mentioned friends are like spices in life. They add flavour, taste and even something extra to an otherwise plain journey in life. Someone else mentioned that a friendship occurs when two people find that, wow, there's someone out there just like them, with the same interests and all.
However, someone else once mentioned that Christ is our best friend. After all, when you put the same weight of expectation upon the normal friends we have, friendships do crumble as none can actually bear the weight of selfishness. But if we go in with an attitude of wanting to bless, friendships will prosper.
As for me, yes, my friends are ultimately very important to me. If you do feel that I've done you wrong, just drop me a line. And, it would be interesting to get your opinion on this issue about friends and friendships.
God Bless~
p/s: Yes Nick, it's not final year syndrome. After all, I've been final year for 3 years
It was pretty interesting then to find that some readers of the Star actually wrote about the same issue, Friendship in today's newspaper (check out the Star, 17th October 2004). Are friendships really important to all of us? Can we survive without friends?
Nowadays, I find myself constantly evaluating who's my friend and who's not. I ponder on who can I trust, who can I share with, but also who can I enjoy their company without feeling awkward. And then, I wonder if I'm the only one who's looking for true friends who care and yet are themselves.
Talking to John about this, I (or rather, we) reached a conclusion that I can't possibly be everybody's friend as that would mean I wouldn't really be anybody's friend. There's a law of quality & quantity time here. I have only 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and 365 days a year, and not all are free time for friends either (yea, especially when you've started working *sigh*)
Thus, I do need to choose who do I actually spend time with, instead of trying to hit blindly with a badminton racket that spells 'Let's make friends' (though at times, I feel it's unfair to not actually make friends with certain people. Just that it gets tiring to try to get a friendship to work when you're the only one doing everything)
And with that, I do feel that I need to keep in touch with some old, good friends I have. Some I haven't met in ages as it's embarassing to tell others I haven't actually graduated from University. And the time apart sometimes slowly drives us apart. It's kinda sad to be lost for things to talk about when we finally meet up and get done with the pleasantries (which include all the crap, jokes and humour)
Someone once mentioned friends are like spices in life. They add flavour, taste and even something extra to an otherwise plain journey in life. Someone else mentioned that a friendship occurs when two people find that, wow, there's someone out there just like them, with the same interests and all.
However, someone else once mentioned that Christ is our best friend. After all, when you put the same weight of expectation upon the normal friends we have, friendships do crumble as none can actually bear the weight of selfishness. But if we go in with an attitude of wanting to bless, friendships will prosper.
As for me, yes, my friends are ultimately very important to me. If you do feel that I've done you wrong, just drop me a line. And, it would be interesting to get your opinion on this issue about friends and friendships.
God Bless~
p/s: Yes Nick, it's not final year syndrome. After all, I've been final year for 3 years
Sunday, October 10, 2004
A good test
Your Brain Usage Profile:
Auditory : 58%
Visual : 41%
Left : 33%
Right : 66%
Leo, you show a slight right-hemisphere dominance with a moderate preference for auditory processing, an unusual and somewhat paradoxical combination of characteristics.
You are drawn to a random and sometimes nonchalant synthesis of material. You learn as it seems important to a specific situation, and might even develop a resentment of others who attempt to direct your learning down a specific channel.
Your right-hemispheric dominance provides a structure that is only loosely organized and one which processes entire swatches of reality, overlooking details. You are emotional in your reactions and perceptual more than logical in your approach, although you can impose structure and a language base when necessary.
Your auditory preference, on the other hand, implies that you process information sequentially and unidimensionally. This combination of right-brain and auditory modes creates conflict, as you want to process data more rapidly than your natural processes allow.
Your tendency to be creative and free-flowing is accompanied by sufficient ability to organize and be logical, allowing you a reasonable degree of success in a number of different endeavors. You take in information methodically and systematically which can then be synthesized rapidly. In this manner, you manage to function consistently well, although certainly less efficiently than you desire.
You prefer the abstract and are a theoretician at heart while retaining the ability to be practical. You find the symbolism in a great deal of what you encounter and are something of a "mystic."
With regards to your lifestyle, you have the mentality which would be good as a philosopher, writer, journalist, or instructor, or possibly as a systems designer or social worker. Perhaps most important is your ability to "listen to your inner voice" as a mode of skipping over unnecessary steps to achieve your goals.
--------------------------------------------
I've been always fascinated with Personality Tests as it tends to reveal deeper things about yourself. Even so, the gluttony of tests around only serves to hamper me as many are just trivial (eg: Find out what kinda girlfriend are you? or Which LOTR character suits you best? Esshh) Thus, dropping by John See's blog one day, I found this personality test.
So how is it? These are the results of the 1st time trying it. Subsequently I tried it again and again and again (hehe, wanted to get better results), but find that this describes me the best. Once, I was even given the results of being a logical and organized(!?) person, exactly the same as Li Lian's test results.
What can I say about this results? Well, it's true I was never a very logical person. I was always in a world of my own in classes, with day dreams of space ships and super powers, heheh. There was just enough logic to help me scrape through my maths and science in secondary school. I never did pass Additional Maths until SPM trials. And in form 6, Maths and Biology were killer papers for me. I could never pass them though I studied 8 hours a day, everyday.
Ever wondered why Engineering? It was a passion of mine to be a Doctor in form 6. To save the people out there from their hurts and wounds. Only later, I found that God's plan for my life was not to save them physically but spiritually. And it was a struggle as I rather be a pastor than some evangelist. After all, there aren't many evangelists around Malaysia, aren't there?
But God's call came again and again. Even when I wasn't exactly walking with God at times. God spoke to me when I met my ailing Grandpa. God spoke to me when on a mission trip in Cambodia. Their poverty struck me. And God spoke to me when a dear friend stuggled with life in the ICU before eventually passing away. 'Would you go?', He asked. 'Yes' was the promise I gave.
Oh yea, on the previous question, why Engineering? Because it's a passport. A passport to do God's work. A passport to go to countries a bible college degree would not allow me to. A passport to ministry. And well, it's been a long journey to getting this passport. Looks like I've gotta put in much more effort in Engineering subjects next semester.
Okay then. Do check out John See's, Nick Lim's, Daniel Khoo's, Li Lian's and Sarah's blogs for their personality test results. How about you? Would you try it as well? Do post a comment here if you've tried the test as well *smile*
p/s: If you're interested in good personality tests, do check out the DISC personality test and also the Keirsey's Temperament Sorter.
Auditory : 58%
Visual : 41%
Left : 33%
Right : 66%
Leo, you show a slight right-hemisphere dominance with a moderate preference for auditory processing, an unusual and somewhat paradoxical combination of characteristics.
You are drawn to a random and sometimes nonchalant synthesis of material. You learn as it seems important to a specific situation, and might even develop a resentment of others who attempt to direct your learning down a specific channel.
Your right-hemispheric dominance provides a structure that is only loosely organized and one which processes entire swatches of reality, overlooking details. You are emotional in your reactions and perceptual more than logical in your approach, although you can impose structure and a language base when necessary.
Your auditory preference, on the other hand, implies that you process information sequentially and unidimensionally. This combination of right-brain and auditory modes creates conflict, as you want to process data more rapidly than your natural processes allow.
Your tendency to be creative and free-flowing is accompanied by sufficient ability to organize and be logical, allowing you a reasonable degree of success in a number of different endeavors. You take in information methodically and systematically which can then be synthesized rapidly. In this manner, you manage to function consistently well, although certainly less efficiently than you desire.
You prefer the abstract and are a theoretician at heart while retaining the ability to be practical. You find the symbolism in a great deal of what you encounter and are something of a "mystic."
With regards to your lifestyle, you have the mentality which would be good as a philosopher, writer, journalist, or instructor, or possibly as a systems designer or social worker. Perhaps most important is your ability to "listen to your inner voice" as a mode of skipping over unnecessary steps to achieve your goals.
--------------------------------------------
I've been always fascinated with Personality Tests as it tends to reveal deeper things about yourself. Even so, the gluttony of tests around only serves to hamper me as many are just trivial (eg: Find out what kinda girlfriend are you? or Which LOTR character suits you best? Esshh) Thus, dropping by John See's blog one day, I found this personality test.
So how is it? These are the results of the 1st time trying it. Subsequently I tried it again and again and again (hehe, wanted to get better results), but find that this describes me the best. Once, I was even given the results of being a logical and organized(!?) person, exactly the same as Li Lian's test results.
What can I say about this results? Well, it's true I was never a very logical person. I was always in a world of my own in classes, with day dreams of space ships and super powers, heheh. There was just enough logic to help me scrape through my maths and science in secondary school. I never did pass Additional Maths until SPM trials. And in form 6, Maths and Biology were killer papers for me. I could never pass them though I studied 8 hours a day, everyday.
Ever wondered why Engineering? It was a passion of mine to be a Doctor in form 6. To save the people out there from their hurts and wounds. Only later, I found that God's plan for my life was not to save them physically but spiritually. And it was a struggle as I rather be a pastor than some evangelist. After all, there aren't many evangelists around Malaysia, aren't there?
But God's call came again and again. Even when I wasn't exactly walking with God at times. God spoke to me when I met my ailing Grandpa. God spoke to me when on a mission trip in Cambodia. Their poverty struck me. And God spoke to me when a dear friend stuggled with life in the ICU before eventually passing away. 'Would you go?', He asked. 'Yes' was the promise I gave.
Oh yea, on the previous question, why Engineering? Because it's a passport. A passport to do God's work. A passport to go to countries a bible college degree would not allow me to. A passport to ministry. And well, it's been a long journey to getting this passport. Looks like I've gotta put in much more effort in Engineering subjects next semester.
Okay then. Do check out John See's, Nick Lim's, Daniel Khoo's, Li Lian's and Sarah's blogs for their personality test results. How about you? Would you try it as well? Do post a comment here if you've tried the test as well *smile*
p/s: If you're interested in good personality tests, do check out the DISC personality test and also the Keirsey's Temperament Sorter.
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
Those trailers
Recently they built U-turn flyovers along the Puchong stretch of the LDP (Damansara-Puchong Highway) I can't guess how much they spent, but those flyovers do look impressive (and I must add, expensive too, heh). However, being Malaysia, they did not put the proper road signs (as in the whole Malaysia too, though boasting one of the best highways in the world), causing well, believe it or not, stuck lorries.
It was during our lunch break when we were on our way back from our excursion to some Puchong 'Chap Fan' restaurant. There were the two of us in my friend's Waja
'Wah, bad jam man'
'Ya dude, jam at this hour somore, what's this la'
'Hey check that out!'
'What?'
'The trailer is stuck up there!' *gasp*
You can trust the government to build proper highways. Just becareful of their signboards *grin*
It was during our lunch break when we were on our way back from our excursion to some Puchong 'Chap Fan' restaurant. There were the two of us in my friend's Waja
'Wah, bad jam man'
'Ya dude, jam at this hour somore, what's this la'
'Hey check that out!'
'What?'
'The trailer is stuck up there!' *gasp*
You can trust the government to build proper highways. Just becareful of their signboards *grin*
Hope while the storm rages
Turmoil,
When everything shatters,
A million questions, many uncared,
Deep valleys, rocky pathways,
Where is God when it hurts?
Run,
To a place to hide,
Shall I give up? Shall I let go?
'Curse God and die,' said Job's wife,
I shall still hold on to Christ, even if I die.
Redemption,
When storms and pains calmed,
A brighter future, a brand new day,
God making things alright in His own way,
Christ my saviour for all of my days.
-----------------------------------------
Hi there~! This is the first time I'm posting a poem as a post. And nope, I'm not down and depressed. Am really fine actually (except for a leaky nose, time to call the plumber, hahaha~)
I thought of the poem sometime last week, when something happened (ya, I know, it's all ambigious, but well it's private, heh) It was during the midst of it all, the uncertainty and yet the hurt that I felt God's presence and God's reassurance that it'll all turn out fine. Just like the sun after the storm.
Things are fine now, friendships better off than what I expected. A testimony to trusting in God even when the storms seem to beat so hard. God's there even if nobody care. And it's even more true when thoughts of running away from problems clouds my mind over and over again.
What else can I say? It's amazing how God has brought the guy nobody wanted to know, the guy nobody gave much hope in, the guy they once called a loser, so far. Hope in the Lord, that's all I can say. Trust in Him although situations you're in drives you to tears. The Lord, our God will bring you through it all.
As I'm writing this, we're on the verge of starting a Youth ministry. And I have faith that God will use this to impact the community, the people and finally the nation. Dreams of revival, of preaching in stadiums filled to the brim, of seeing the Muslims saved. Not bad for a person they once wrote off as a loser huh?
God Bless~!
When everything shatters,
A million questions, many uncared,
Deep valleys, rocky pathways,
Where is God when it hurts?
Run,
To a place to hide,
Shall I give up? Shall I let go?
'Curse God and die,' said Job's wife,
I shall still hold on to Christ, even if I die.
Redemption,
When storms and pains calmed,
A brighter future, a brand new day,
God making things alright in His own way,
Christ my saviour for all of my days.
-----------------------------------------
Hi there~! This is the first time I'm posting a poem as a post. And nope, I'm not down and depressed. Am really fine actually (except for a leaky nose, time to call the plumber, hahaha~)
I thought of the poem sometime last week, when something happened (ya, I know, it's all ambigious, but well it's private, heh) It was during the midst of it all, the uncertainty and yet the hurt that I felt God's presence and God's reassurance that it'll all turn out fine. Just like the sun after the storm.
Things are fine now, friendships better off than what I expected. A testimony to trusting in God even when the storms seem to beat so hard. God's there even if nobody care. And it's even more true when thoughts of running away from problems clouds my mind over and over again.
What else can I say? It's amazing how God has brought the guy nobody wanted to know, the guy nobody gave much hope in, the guy they once called a loser, so far. Hope in the Lord, that's all I can say. Trust in Him although situations you're in drives you to tears. The Lord, our God will bring you through it all.
As I'm writing this, we're on the verge of starting a Youth ministry. And I have faith that God will use this to impact the community, the people and finally the nation. Dreams of revival, of preaching in stadiums filled to the brim, of seeing the Muslims saved. Not bad for a person they once wrote off as a loser huh?
God Bless~!
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