Rats

Looking back at the mission trip training in Malacca and the suppers we've had, there was once we took supper just opposite KFC, near church. It was an Indian mamak. Nothing special, except there was a lot of rats running around. Rats as in those big brown ones dat go 'Squeek squeek!'

Anyway, the funny thing happened when we were walking back after our yam char session. A rat suddenly appeared from the sewers and unto the path of my friend. What happened? He stepped on the rat's tail, while the rat was try to jump down. So then, we had a a rat dangling by it's tail, struggling to get loose, but yet, unable to coz it was hindered by it's tail.

Quite a sight. Really

*Grin*

We're back in business

Hi there! I'm back again! Usually I do not write about my everyday happenings due to:
a) Privacy
b) Hmm..I do not want to bore you guys to death

Anyways, I'll be writing again these few days, until we leave for the mission trip in S'rwk in the wee hours of the coming Monday morning.

Oh yeah, why the sudden bout of writing abt this mission trip? I guess it's something I'm really looking forward to. I pray that it would be a milestone in my christian walk. Something that I could hold on, even through years down the road.

Anyways, to keep you all updated, it has really been an interesting and fun training in Malacca. There was the usual teaching. But in between came the evening aerobics, arm wrestling competitions (the gals even arm wrestled among themselves! Will post the photos asap) and the 3 minutes preaching/testimony which is compulsory.













And most of our makan times were interesting too. We had breakfast every morning, (Amazing, coz its something which I don't usually do) go food hunting every lunch and dinner. (due to some food crazy people here in the mission trip) And, last but not least, we had Char Siew Fan for supper almost every night! (FYI, Char Siew Fan refers to a famous Pork rice shop at Laksamana Street, Malacca) What a crazy experience it had been~!

Have been learning things here too. More to handling people. Thank God for the lessons in life.

Orite then, before I bore you readers to death *grin*. Not much preaching on this message though.

God Bless~

5 loaves 2 fishes

One thing that I've constantly been struggling with, is the issue of giving up my rights to my life. Instead, God's been telling me to let Him use me as a vessel. But at times, it's hard cause I do want to do my own things.

Sometimes, I ask God whether would I do ministry alone or with a wife, a partner that could help ease the burden and share the joy of doing God's work. My biggest fear is to have to do God's work alone, as a one man show. The fear of coming back home to an empty home. Yea, I know, God will lead, but at times like this, it's a real hard struggle.

Next semester, I would have only 1 subject to take. Thus, I'll try to find a part time job and also enrol for night classes at either Bible College Malaysia (BCM) or Theological Center of Asia (TCA). But, I do ask God, 'Am I ready for ministry?' and keep telling God, 'I'm lacking people skills~!' And how about a wife God? Heh. And to think of it, I'm still studying! *Why am I thinking about all these?*

God has really been working in me these days. The issue of letting go of my rights, but instead, being a blessing to others, have me seeing some relationships get better. Guess, that when we bless others instead of our wants and needs, it'll help the friendships.

Anyway, the thing that God's been placing in my heart is the issue of putting my future on the altar. Just like Jacob, when he put the young Isaac on the altar. Let it be a wife, ministry or work; I want to put God 1st in everything. Even if nothing comes back, I'll be satisfied.

A writer once wrote about the 5 loaves and 2 fishes. She was single, available and in ministry. She mentioned that if she selfishly kept her life for her own, she would only satisfy her future husband and herself. But if she let God break her and use her as the 5 loaves and 2 fishes, God'll use her to feed and meet the needs of the multitude

God, use me~!

God bless~

Training

Hi! I won't be around for the next few days for our Sarawak mission trip training. Please do check out the blogspot later yea. Take care and God bless~!

p/s: Actually, we're in our 3rd day of training here in Mlk. It's been really good and nice. Hope to post more when I've the time to do so. Here's the only time I could afford to go to the cybercafe *grin*

Those wannabes

Recently, a burger stall opened at Cyberia, Cyberjaya. I was there for the 1st time yesterday, after hearing so many things about it, when two people caught my attention. And there they were, nicely dressed in designer clothing and talking loudly in English with an American accent. Here's an excerpt

'Soe, basic-ally, you've meth ######'s friend, right?'
'Yea man, I meth her laste monthe, at some gatherin' '

And on and on they went. The funny thing? Hmm.. both of them were Malays (erm, well, it's quite a sight to see Malays talking to each other in English. What more with an American accent?)

Heh, those wannabes~

Personality test

Was finding for something to post, when a friend forwarded me a personality test to try. I'm really surprised with the results. However, it shows that I've a lot to work on. God willing, things will get better.

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Low
Schizoid:	Moderate
Schizotypal:	Moderate
Antisocial:	Low
Borderline:	Moderate
Histrionic:	Moderate
Narcissistic:	Low
Avoidant:	High
Dependent:	High
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Moderate
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --

The 'ME' Attitude

Pissed

That was how I felt just a moment ago with regards to a certain person. It's not so much about what the person did or done to me, but more towards what I felt how things should be. Thinking about it, it's not the first time I felt pissed at the person. And it's not the first time I felt like like grabbing the person and and asking, "What's with you?! Why are you like dat?!"

Sometimes, I feel that I do not understand the person, and the more time I spend trying to figure the situation out, it just goes beyond me. Why this? Why that? Why!!? All these are not something I can answer or figure out.

Praying about it, I felt God telling me, it all lies in the 'ME' attitude. Me this, Me that, Me 1st, You last, Me winner, You loser. Sometimes, I look too much at myself, my situation and my interests. And when things don't turn out the way I assumed it should be, I get pissed.

But what right do I have to claim to the person and the person's reactions? Pushing the situation usually makes things worse, even worse than before.

Instead I felt God asking me to look at it from the person's point of view. To give the person a benefit of doubt and space to breathe. To look more on how I could be a blessing to the person. Even if that means more frustrations and going to God for strength and wisdom.

It's hard, but maybe, just maybe, it's all part of God's masterplan. To learn to die to myself and to put other people's interests ahead of mine.

God, use me. *sigh*

Rain!

It's finally raining here at Cyberjaya! After weeks and weeks of heat and a dry spell, the rain has finally came! Thanks God for the rain! Looking at my yahoo messenger list, many people changed their status from such as 'overheating' to 'cooling down'.

Even the Indonesian contruction workers, jumped and shouted with glee, unlike their normal quiet selves.

Rain. It could really do wonders to people's lives. Thank you Lord for providing it at the right time~ *grin*

p/s: Was doing the rain dance in my room, cladded only in my underwear after it started raining. NOT

A tribute to friends

It's this time of the year again. We're now having our finals at MMU. And being the final semester of the year, it's the time to say goodbye, to patch up things and to part company with the friends we're fond of. Sometimes, we wish we could have spent more time getting to know some people. Sometimes, we wish that things had turned out better than the way it is, that we could turn back time and turn back our mistakes.

This blog is a tribute to friends and to friendship; A tribute to the brotherhood that we've had in the Christian Fellowship; A toast to the fellowship of Christians within MMU that has stood the tests of times and trials.

It's my 3rd 'final year' again in MMU. Three years have passed, where I was supposed to graduate, but I did not. And each year, brings a kind of feeling that comes when you see your friends graduate, the people you've grown close to leaving and starting life anew in the working world. Life goes on, but now at this very moment, you'll feel even more appreciative of them, of all the shared moments and memories that come along with it.

This year would be the hardest for me, as I feel I've grown and learnt much with this batch of graduating people. We've grown close, only to see that each one of us have a different path in life. I've shared tears and dreams with some of them, while gazing at the moon and stars (and being mozzie food at the same time). Only time will tell if our friendships would last. Only God will know where He wants us to be.

To my dear friends, who are leaving MMU, thanks for everything. In no particular order of significance:

Nick Lim Jin Sean, Kevin Koay Jun Yi, Alvin Keng Kong Wai, Jacklyn Lim Hsiao Ching, Katherine Gan Sook Fuen, Wong Shiau Wen, You Jane'nette

Will miss you all. *Sigh*

God Bless~

The Paradox

I failed.

I failed God. 'Failed?', you might ask. Yes, I failed God just a moment ago, when my flesh got the better of me, when lust won over holiness, when sin crept in over purity. And it is a moment of frustration for me as I try as hard as I could to stay away from all these things.

Some of you might be surprised. "What, Leo?! You failed?!", you might ask. Yes, I failed, and it's been a long struggle to keep pure, in this world that everything goes. It's hard, when the internet is at your fingertips, and there's nobody to stop you from going whereever you want to, whenever you feel like going to it. No police, no mom, no dad to stop you, just you and God. No one else could possibly know, could they?

For the past few weeks, I've kept myself holy, pure and righteous before God. But today, it feels like I've to start all over again from square 1. "God, I failed, yet again." I've lost count of the amount of times I told God that I've failed Him once more, of the amount of times I took God's grace and mercy for granted. And of how many times, God forgave and gave me comfort and peace that only Christ could provide.

Some of you might think I'm some kind of holiness freak. Yes, I am. And I'm not trying to be extra holy to impress anyone, but just trying to live out a Christian live worthy of Christ. I have to admit, I'm not sinless, but I'm just another one of you out there, trying to run the race, trying to pursue God. A flawed God Chaser.

Temptation always feels nice and good, but once you're done with it, you feel empty, far away from God. Satan goes around telling you that you're not good enough. How much more for me? Someone who has preached and seen people saved. At this crucial moment, having God matters even more than before. Who else could fill in the void in my soul? Not friends, not a girlfriend, but Christ and Christ alone.

Did you notice? When we begin to take our lives into our hands and try to seek fulfillment and pleasure, it does not work? That we'll be more empty than we began with? Didn't Christ say, "Whoever who seeks his life, shall lose it. Whoever who loses his life for me, shall have it." That's the paradox of Christian living. The more we try to fulfill our desires, our wants and our flesh, the more empty we get. But living the life that Christ has commanded, even to the point of death, brings much more fulfillment.

The British missionary, who inspired thousands of others to go and witness for Christ after his death, died even before reaching his destination, China. When they found him, they found he held his notebook tightly in his hands as he died. Written in it were the words,"No retreat, No compromise, No regrets"

It'll take much discipline and courage to face another temptation, another mauling from Satan. But the Bible says, 'Stand firm, and your adversary shall flee'. I shall run the race again, picking myself up from where I've fallen. As Paul, I won't sit around and look at my sin and tell myself it's ok to continue sinning. But no, I shall run the race like a marathon runner, striving ahead for the prize, Christ.

Let's run the race together as imperfect people!

God Bless~

Elections Day 2

Was talking with my brother about the elections when he related to us of Lim Kit Siang's brilliant campaign. (Lim Kit Siang is the head of DAP, the main opposition party)

Lim Kit Siang during his campaign:
"You all would need a balancing force in this country, a force to keep the government in check. So, who else is a better balancing force than DAP? Who else can keep the government in check? So, vote me. I'm YOUR best choice!"

Needless to say, Lim Kit Siang won with an overwhelming majority.

Looking for a church?

Was looking through my old posts at the old CFMMU yahoo groups when I remembered I posted this while still finding for a church last year. Hopefully it'll be a help for those of you who are still finding a church. Btw, I re-edited portions of the article to keep it up to date.

Hi there! Are you finding for a church? Fear not, cause I'm finding for a church too, haha. So, what's the point of reading about how to find a church? Well, if you're already a regular at some church, then I guess this article isn't for you. However, if you're still UNDECIDED and not sure of what to do, or which church to attend, the amount of churches to choose from can be terrifying.

And what's the big deal about choosing a church? Can't we just go to any church and just settle down? I guess you can, but finding the right church is just like finding a life partner. Ermm..maybe it's harder, or maybe it's slightly easier. But I guess, if you're finding for a place to grow spiritually for the rest of your MMU study life or even the rest of your life, the correct church is important.

So, what do I need to look for in a church? I guess it boils down to 4 important aspects, which I'll now touch upon:-


1) Are you comfortable in the Church?
Being comfortable in church is not finding a church with the best seats and aircond. Nor does it mean having a church that has the most ~CHUN~ babes or where all your friends are going. However, being comfortable in a church means whether the preaching, praying and worship styles suits you. If you have been going to a church for a couple of months and you find yourself running to the washroom everytime the worship starts, or if you tend to fall asleep everytime the preacher preaches, I guess the church's style might not really suit you. Another aspect of being comfortable, is whether do you like staying in the church? If you find yourself isolated all the time or missing service due to 'sickness' everytime Sunday comes, I guess it may also mean that it is not the right church.


2) Is there an opportunity to serve in the Church?
Being comfortable is one thing. Serving is another. Serving God in the church you belong to, helps build up Christian character in you. When you visit the church, remember to ask the Pastor or the leaders in the church, on what area could you serve in. Be it fetching people, washing washrooms or vacuuming the place after service, just do it. God'll bless you and build you up from there. As Jesus once wash the feet of his disciples, we're all called to be servants. Only through serving, do we begin to learn the principles of Christianity. It doesn't matter if the church is small or big, opportunity to serve always exists. Generally, , it is easier to get a chance to serve in smaller churches. Especially for worship ministry. However, I'm sure bigger churches do need people with a servant heart to serve in certain ministries too.


3) Pray and be sensitive to the Holy Spirit.
Pray, really hard and be as sensitive to where God wants you to be. Sometimes, we do not know where to go, or which church to attend. A lot of churches have great preachers, good worship and also a friendly environment with a lot of opportunity to serve. It's a hard decision no? Pray and ask God to lead you even before you go to the church on Sunday. I'm sure that after a couple of times, or after visiting couple of churches, God'll lead you to the correct church.


4) Finally, don't church hop.
Ha! You've reached my last point! Don't church hop. If you're still looking for a church now, it's still ok. But try to settle down in a church within 2-3 weeks time. Church hopping deprives you of many things. Namely, meaningful friendships with the people of the church, opportunity to serve and also a support group when you're down feeling the blues. ^_~. Haha, that's why it's important to pray before you start looking. If you pray, God'll lead, you just need to go and serve.


Alright then. I pray that you'll be happy in whatever church you're gonna attend and serve in.

Shalom,
Leo Koo

Elections Day

Some of us were at the polling station today (Sunday) to help out as BN observers. I was assigned room 4, which had voters with age ranging from 38-48. It was an interesting job, observing the voters, middle age people who are beginning to feel the half-century mark upon their lives. Some looked much older than their age, while others (especially the ladies) looked not a day beyond 32-34! (boy, I wonder what skin care product they used)

As I sat there,I began to notice that age has nothing to do with confidence and the way people bring themselves about. There were aunties and uncles who at 1st glance, you can tell they're self-assured people, confident and secure in themselves. On the other hand, there were people who looked like they were lost, people who stuttered & people who looked like they needed some extra attention.

Not that it's bad or anything, but I always assumed that you'll grow more confident and self assured as you grow older. Always assumed older people had it all going for them. Guess that they're just as human as us after all, with their insecurities, worries and troubles.

Haha, while I was complaining to God during the polling session that I wanted the other room (that had a younger set of people, would have been more interesting), guess who walked in?

Pastor Julie Khoo from Glad Tidings! (now, that's a hot chick! *hint hint*)

Serve me

The past week had been a hectic week. Assignments, lab and lab reports, Christian activities with the CF and church and also the feeling of running away. 'Why running away?', you might ask. It's because at times I don't feel I have the adequate skills in handling people.

I'm the kind of person who likes to be around others, but sometimes I could only get to a certain level before being lost and not knowing what to say. (and if I try to say something, it ends up lame *sigh*) And it's hard, because I sometimes tend to say the wrong thing at the wrong time (heh, though it's getting better all the time). Add some complex relationships to the equation and I'll get a headache from trying to figure them out. (nope, panadol doesn't work here)

Knowing that God has placed a call on my life, I sometimes wonder how God's going to use me. Christian Ministry is mostly about people and people skills. If I was to pastor a church now, heh, I doubt it will stay as alive and as big as it is right now. Isn't it so much easier to hide behind the computer monitor playing games and waste my life away like I always did when I was still a teenager, facing rejection in school. You know, the funny thing is that the more you learn about handling people, the more you find you're lacking in it (hmm, or is it just me?)

Anyway, we did a character study of Joseph a few days ago, but it only began to sink in yesterday. Joseph, after knowing that God called him had to endure prison, beatings by his brothers and also seduction from his master's wife. It was only after so many years, that God used Joseph. By that time Joseph was no longer the brash and boastful young man he was, but someone matured in the Lord. Similarly, Moses, after 40 years in the wilderness did God use him. 40 long years. 40 years of uncertainty, of not knowing what to do, of regrets. 40 years of being broken and moulded again. Didn't you notice, Moses was tending the sheep when God appeared to him to tend to HIS sheep, the Israelites? God is in control, even if we don't seem to feel it.

I do not know what the future holds, of how God would use me. While worshipping God yesterday in Sunday service, we sang the song 'Send me, I will go' which brought back the commitment I gave to God as a teary eyed teenager in Port Dickson. Looking at myself in the mirror, I do not know how God's going to use me to bring revival to Malaysia and to move Nations. But I guess, neither did Joseph when God gave him the dream.

All that I know is that God's telling me 'Serve me and my church'. Just like Moses, when God spoke to him in that burning bush. Just like Gideon, when the angel of God appeared to him. As a pastor once put it, 'It's not about looking at the future and wondering how to get there, let God handle that. But look at today and see how you can impact YOUR world with Christ'

God Bless~

Dogs

Never play with an overzealous dog. Especially one dat likes to jump & bite. Heh, how do I know? Got bitten on the bum by my Pastor's dog during dinner yesterday when it jumped on me and decided it wanted a taste of my bum. (nah, for all of you who are imagining things, it's not dat bad. Hope it doesn't sound obscene though)

Now, thank God I was wearing jeans then. They do provide the extra protection *wink wink*

Oscars

Did you watch the recent 2003-2004 Oscars awards on the telly? Even if you're not into movies, try to get a hold of it. Billy Crystal was in his element as he lambasted New Zealand and Lord of the Rings during its (LOTR:ROTK) Oscar winning spree. What were his infamous punchlines for that particular day?

'It's now official, New Zealand has no one left to thank'
and

'We just found out that people are moving to New Zealand just to be thanked'

Heh, one of the funniest and yet most decent Oscars in these recent years.

Old friend

Was looking through Irene Q's blog links when I clicked on Wingie's Cradle. Looking through, I found Woan Yun's Blog, a really old friend of mine from secondary school. She was one of those who stood by me when things got bad in secondary school.

Amazing isn't it how you sometimes stumble upon an old friend while surfing? Finding her online brings back memories of when we used to group study together with some others for SPM. She was a sweet person whom most guys didn't bother trying to know as they were always too busy trying to score on the chicks. But to whoever who knew her as a friend, she was a bonus (yea, felt sorry for those shallow guys, heh) She was someone who was there whenever you need a listening ear, someone who taught us Physics, Chemistry and Maths when we group study and someone who had a sweet smile for her friends.

It's been 6-7 years since I last met her. We sort of gradually lost contact as we were all busy with our studies. Studying STPM was a killer as you had to study hard everyday. *Sigh* Guess she should be married now. Nevertheless, wouldn't mind an extra angpau next year though, as her house is a walking distance from mine *wink wink*. Now, what's her phone number again, guess I got some catching up to do with an old friend.

Btw, Irene, if you're reading this, we've met before.

God Bless~

The SuperMalar Sausage Secret

Hey there, ever heard of the supermalar? Well, the supermalar is the spiciest hotdog you could find when you go over to one of those roadside Chinese hotdog sellers. (heh, do not know how it's spelled, but I know it's something like supermalar) One good example of the supermalar hotdog is at Restoran Ramai, Puchong.

So, how do we survive the supermalar hotdog? Heh, without proper guidelines, you'll end up with a numbed tongue and puffed-up lips like Angelina Jolie (perfect if you're going to the prom the next day and intend to do some lip service, heh) So, here's the secret of eating it, in easy step-by-step instructions:

1) Do not use your lips, but bite using only your teeth
2) When part of it is inside, do not play around with it with your tongue, but chew it using the molar portions of your teeth
3) Swallow it as soon as you can (and try not to spit it out no matter how hot it is)
4) Give your tongue air ventilation (trust me on this, drinking water will only serve to make the pain worse. Heh, so open your mouth and huff and puff away the pain)
5) Go for the next bite
6) Don't forget to smile to your disbelieving friends!

Alrights, guess dat's all about eating the super hot sausage. Btw, did anyone noticed it was 02/03/04 yesterday? Happy trying!

Heh, anyone up for a Extra Hot SuperMalar Challenge?

What matters

Met up with some old CF friends recently, most of them had graduated. What amazed me was that though we weren't really buddies back while all of us were still studying (yea, I still am studying *sigh*), but leaving MMU and growing up made us all closer.

One of them said that he was really amazed at how I managed to survive and yet improve a lot from the last time he met me (It was true that I went through a hard period of time in MMU and life, but thank God it's over) He even apologised for how some people were in CF then. I guess it happens. Crap happens here and there. Sometimes there are just some people that won't get along with you, no matter what you do. But as long as you've made the effort, isn't that what matters most?

Looking back, the Christian Fellowship was a place I met and made meaningful friendships. Even though I had my gang of friends then, but nowadays, it's harder to talk to them now than the friends I served with in the CF. It's always so much easier to relate when you talk about God, church, ministry and what's God currently teaching you. Somehow, relating on a Christian level gives us an instant bond of brotherhood. Unlike this, meeting up my old gang of MMU buddies, conversation would range from job, money, house and life partner. And sometimes corny jokes on chicks, heh.

Guess I'll end here. What matters? Not the crappy people that reject you or ignore you (heh, or me for this case), but people whom after graduation, you could still look to them as friends, buddies and brothers. People whom you can call for a drink and a chat at some mamak to catch up on old times. We sometimes don't realise how much others mean to us until we graduate and don't see them anymore. When they're around, we quarrel, squibble and get frustrated with them, or maybe them with us.

Isn't life too short for hating someone? And compared to the cruel world out there, it's always just minor things in CF that make people pissed off with each other and quarrel. Grow up dudes! *sigh*

God Bless~

Just Friends?

Was out in Serdang yesterday, when we paid Yuet Pei a visit. Yuet Pei is a dear old friend, a very nice person and also a babe (Heh, she always claims that she's the best 'product' Kampar ever produced *ehem ehem*) Known her ever since we entered MMU. She was my neighbour, my regular makan kaki and the chick that a lot of guys wanted to be with (yea, even non Christian ones, you should have seen the fan club outside the house during her 18th b'day)

As dear and close as we are, we're just good friends, platonic friends, nothing more. Which brings me to the topic, Can guys just be friends with gurls? What's with being attached to the 1st gurl (or guy, if u're a gurl) you've got to know better and are attracted to? Heck, some people don't even know the other person when they 1st start dating.

And do we have to try to get attached to the 1st person we find attractive? It sometimes irks me to see people thinking in such narrow minded ways. And what happens when they find that their girlfriend are not really that 'ngam' with them? Heh, they break up.

Isn't it so much easier to be friends 1st without any romantic attachments involved? There's so much less pressure of having to try to impress her and being someone you're not. After all, she'll get to know the real you one day or another. And gone is the awkwardness of trying to make conversation, good conversation.

Anyways, another thing that irks me is the fact that at university level, there are still some people who would go around teasing a guy being friends with a girl. Such teasing makes situations awkward for both guy and gal, and I guess it either drives people apart (for the fear of being teased, and this usually happens) or closer. Mebbe the people who go around teasing actually has personal interest in that girl and do not like other people to get to know her better? I dunno..*sigh* Why can't they start talking to her instead of teasing?

Once you've reached my age, you'll actually see things from a different perspective. Teasing and gossiping about these becomes childish pursuits that are irritating. Do you actually see people in their mid twenties teasing a guy who's friends with a girl?

Anyway, to sum it up, Is your girlfriend (or the person you're attracted to) someone you can relate to, share with, do things with and spend mundane time with? It's something I learnt from a dear girl-friend.

Last but not least, to the girls that I've been learning from, lepaking around with and made life in MMU so much more colorful, in no particular order of significance:

Yuet Pei, Michelle Ding, Melisa Ann, Charis Liew, Sarah Lee, Connee Lim, Tan Chern Yen & You Jane'nette

Thanks again